Are You Positive?

A recent event gave me the opportunity to experience the power of positive thinking. All too often we let the rigors of the day get to us and we end up caught in the mire. We easily lose sight of staying positive when the negativity around us creates an obstacle. It's not until something big happens that we remember to put things into perspective.

When you have the opportunity, as I did, to assess whether you are taking advantage of the power of positive thinking, there are five questions you can consider to help maintain your positive focus. As we go through each question, I'll use my recent experience as an example.

 

The five questions to consider are:

1. How does positive thinking fit with what I value? lue?
2. Have I made assumptions?
3. What's perfect about where I'm at right now?
4. What will my reaction be?
5. Who do I choose to show up as in this world?

So, the first question you may ask yourself is: "How does positive thinking fit with what I value?" Your values define who you are. They help to shape what you want and how you live your life. Positive thinking fits differently for everyone because we may have different values. For example, I value being healthy, feeling good, and working out (physical activity). Remembering that I have this value assisted me in maintaining a high level of positive thinking when I was faced with the possibility that I had cancer. I chose not to think that I could have something terribly wrong with me, but instead I focused on knowing that I felt really good, I was working out, and overall was very healthy. I was also thinking that if something was wrong with me I was going to do whatever it took to become healthy again. By reviewing my value(s) I maintained positive thinking at a time when negativity could have easily crept in.

The second question to consider is: "Have I made assumptions?" We often make assumptions to fill in the unknown when we are uncomfortable leaving the unknown. And so many times we assume the worst. After multiple diagnostic scans, the cancer surgeon still didn't have conclusive evidence. It was a big unknown. I could have made many assumptions about what it was. I could have assumed it was malignant, benign, or nothing at all. I stayed very aware of whether I was making assumptions by checking in with myself. I asked whether I really knew the answer or if I was just trying to fill in an unknown. By actively refusing to make assumptions I was able to stay much more positive about moving forward.

The third questions is about finding your silver lining: "What's perfect about where I'm at right now?" Sometimes we find it hard to find the silver lining in the situation we're in. It often tries to elude us with lots of distractions. I have to admit, finding what was perfect about potentially having cancer was not easy and I did it. It was perfect that if something was wrong, we found it and could begin working on correcting it. It was perfect that I was surrounded with family, friends, and colleagues who fully supported me and sent their positive thoughts my way. It was perfect that I was experiencing something that I had never experienced before. By reviewing what was perfect about the situation I was able to keep smiling each day.

The fourth question has to do with your reaction. Ask yourself: "What will my reaction be?" The one thing we have control over in a situation is how we choose to react. Thinking back, I had many opportunities where I could have chosen to react negatively: when I first found out that we were looking at the possibility of cancer; when I found out I needed more scans to take a closer look; and when I found out I had to have surgery for a biopsy. Each step of the way I asked myself: "What will my reaction be?" I decided that my reactions would be grounded in positive thinking. I was thankful that I had the best cancer surgeon working with me. I was appreciative that we were going to figure out what we were seeing on the scans. I reacted with curiosity and a drive to find out what was going on. Had I not utilized the power of positive thinking I may have reacted with anger or resentment. The power of positive thinking kept my reaction positively focused each step of the way.

 

The last question is really an umbrella over all of the other questions and that is to ask: "Who do I choose to show up as in this world?"  When confronting difficult situations we sometimes forget that we are still in this world and affecting the people around us.  We don't drop out of our families, work, or society just because we're having a tough time.  How we choose to show up each day is a reflection of our character. Regardless of the situation I was faced with, when I asked myself who I chose to show up as, it reminded me that overall I am positive, I help others, and I have fun. Why would I let one thing going on in my life alter who I choose to show up as? I answered myself with: I wouldn't. So I didn't.

These five questions helped me maintain a positive perspective on what seemed to be a very serious situation. As I read back through this, it reads a lot easier than it really was. I'll be the first to admit that it is not always easy to utilize positive thinking, but when you do it truly is powerful. I reached out to my family and friends via email with a request that they share their positive thoughts with me just before I went into surgery. Many wrote back with beautiful positive thoughts and I knew that I had an amazing powerful force working in my favor. When the surgeon opened my up he found absolutely nothing to biopsy. He was so amazed he had one of his partners take a look and tell him what he saw. The partner looked and was amazed too. All of the scans had apparently showed a false positive. The surgeons were baffled. They really didn't know what to think. I know what I think. I think it's the power of positive thinking! nk it's the power of positive thinking!

Written by Jennifer Mounce, President, Coach Effect. Coach Effect is a coaching, consulting and development firm focused on engaging employees through leadership and organizational effectiveness. For more information, please contact us.